The What?

I want to let you all know that you can now sub to my newsletter for updates. Thank you. Week 11, Oct 2025 One of the battles I frequently find myself in, with myself, is to keep track of all my things. I forget where I put them the moment they leave my hand and when I need them again, I have to go through all possible pockets (pants, bags, wallets, etc) to eventually find them in one place I would have never checked, not even considering it a possibility. I place things so absently that most of the time I can’t even remember that I was carrying them while at the same time I can pull out images from my memory of things my friends can’t find and remind them about it. “yeah I saw your key under the books on your table” or something like that. It is very frustrating, to be constantly looking for things. My friends who sometimes visit me tell me I am very organized (not true at all) after they have a look at my cupboard and my neatly arranged assortment of wires, batteries, gadgets, etc. This is only because I am constantly looking for them and honestly if I don’t give them a home I will never find them. It’s for my mental stability because it does not matter how many times I spot my scissors in a month, I can never find it when I actually need it. ...

Week 10, Oct 2025 Happy spooktober everyone. Hoping your entire month is spooky and full of calcium. I was complaining to myself how I have not traveled much around Bangalore the time I was starting this blog. Now, after 3 months, I have left Bangalore for the time being and I’m traveling for the next few weeks. Manifestation. I went to Mysore that time, after complaining to myself, but that was a cope while this is freedom. Since then A lot has changed for me, or maybe I have changed and everything else has remained the same but I feel like I am a very different person looking back just six months ago. I am glad though, at least I feel happier. Everyone I talk to tells me what I am doing is great. I like believing in that but honestly I am just scared of what I am doing. My last words to Roommate were “the only thing I am guilty of is having fun” after he basically told me that my biking setup looks stupid. ...

Week 9, Sep 2025 My time as an employed citizen has come almost to an end. Nine day from now I’ll become useless to the income tax department. I am very excited to be unemployed though. For the first time in a long time I’ll be just free to do whatever I want. A few months ago I was speaking my mother about growing up, childhood and her experiences. I was telling her how, when I was still in my school days, the best feeling I used to have during that time was the last day of the school. Entering the exam hall knowing that after a few hours I’ll be free to do whatever I want. It was such a liberating moment when the bell rang. Of course I did not think of it that way back then. At that time all I cared about was endlessly playing cricket and football. Gaming on my friend’s PS2 and going to shady forums on the internet when no ones home. Looking back, those days were some of the best simply because of how care free I was every day until the next school term started. Cringe School. Anyway, I was telling her how I have not felt that way in a very long time and maybe never will (we did not really know about the latter, neither of us have really retied). But I think being unemployed comes the closest, at least for the time being. ...

Week 8, Sep 2025 Slower Pace Last week was restful. I did not do much. At least I didn’t do things that annoy me. I have been cooking more often the past few days. I don’t know what happened to bring this change in me but I have been enjoying it a lot. “Very restorative” ~ Burt. It’s also because I have become very sick and tired of ordering food from zomato. (I don’t use swiggy at all). Looking at same five suggestions every evening is very unappetizing. It’s nauseating. “Yes, I’d like to have the same biryani with 50 times more oil than any reasonable person should consume for the third time this week. It’s not a problem.” I no longer enjoy eating out. I have become desensitized to it. Though I have my problems with my food situation in Banglore, I also enjoyed the process of cooking. I am the person with least amount of patience. Really. I need Mark to put a chip in my brain so that I can have subway surfers anytime I have to pay attention for longer than three seconds. Regardless, the 45 minute struggles have been “very restorative”, peak efficiency, peak focus. ...

Week 7, September 2025 Year of linux Every now and then, for the last 5 years, I hear or read someone on the internet say that this year is going to be of linux. It almost sounds like an epic, how the open source warriors will topple over the evil big tech oligarchs and world peace will be restored. Windows will be used by complete degenerates and anarchists. Apple will be banished to Ghana and forced to use electronics from the dumping ground they helped create, so that they can finally keep their promise of recycling. It sounds comforting, but so far the only thing linux has done is give me more mental breakdowns every year. ...